New book of magic chapter - preflight checklist ego health

[Michael_Sharp]

http://subscriber.michaelsharp.org/ego-childhood-presence/

this is a long one. The book of magic is turning into quite a treatise. There's about 3 times the amount of information in this chapter than in the first iteration. I guess I was too much in a hurry to get it out the first time. Oh well

m

[amiawake]

michael
is there a reson why eveyrthing is underlined?
I am having a hard time reading, not hard time reading, more so following as the lines distract me..
maybe it is just my slight headache..;(


thank you in advance
ami

[Michael_Sharp]

oopps. fixed

[Lorraines]

wow,

it is a wonder how any of us can bring large amounts of consciousness inside of our PU.

As far as attachment issues how do you work on those? It would seem to me that if you are walking around detached because you cannot deal with the pain of your circumstances then to attach you would have to open up to the reality of that pain but wouldn't doing that cause the consciousness to push away from the PU? 
How do you convince consciousness to stick around while you improve your conditions?
 
Intend it? Is that why it is so important to state your intent to move forward?

[HAPPYELF]

As far as attachment issues how do you work on those?

The first thing that  comes to my mind for this issue is to practice on my own life.  How can I demonstrate healthy attachment to those children and teens that I interact with now.  I can identify the unhealthy attachments I have experienced and change them by demonstating healthy attachments.

[Michael_Sharp]

I think the biggest implication of this is that we must create beautiful life experiences for ourselves and others. It's important that WE feel joy and have positive experience, else you get this problem with attachment. OF course, this is a political and economic issue much more than it is a individual or psychological issue right?

anybody care to comment

m

[amiawake]

I didn't get to finish reading the article, my 16 year old needed help with some college course choices, he tested yesterday and the college would like him in an advance math course this summer..so yeah!

any way I did not finish reading...
my question being
is your question about the attachments
or the experiences
in referring to the political and economic question you posed.


 
ami

[amiawake]

It’s all the “ranking” and assessment and judgment they do to you with their tests and their competitions and their idolatrous worship of hierarchy and strength

blah..
here my son is all excited about scoring high on his college exam

Rather than building up strength and confidence and character in individuals, as you’re told competition and ranking does, it really only undermines ego and self-esteem as it creates losers out of the majority of people on this planet.

as parents though, we can create a balance for our children so that it does not damage the self esteem, correct?

As my self esteem was completely non existent as a teenager and semi adult, I have worked very hard to make sure that my childrens self worth is very high.  Mine now is very good, I understand more of my self than years ago, I am a part of the all and really it matters not what any one else thinks of me.  I am hoping that my children can assert this same behavior, they are unique they are one of a kind and they are loved no matter what others think of them.

going back to my son, isn't it healthy for his self to experience the choice offered to him?


and back to reading ...

ami

[IamALLthatIam]

Hi everyone,

 I don't think it is just a political and economical issue, i think there are other factors too, ie social issues, i shall have to come back to this when my kids are in bed as i is pretty chaotic in here at the moment with extremely high volume levels........... i really do appreciate where you are coming from Michael on the parenting and anger issues , it's hard , really hard sometimes...... and easy to see now how some attachments occur. It's not always easy either to counteract with joyous experiences.......... brilliant article BTW....... ( I have given Si a couple of corrections)   

[HAPPYELF]

OF course, this is a political and economic issue much more than it is a individual or psychological issue right?

hugely

Our leaders need to know that programs such as Resources For Childcaring, Early Childhood Family Education, and Socialized Healthcare are a necessary part for some families in society.  They are not to be an easy whack to balance the budget in order to  make your political self look better so that you can run for president in 2012.

It does take a village to raise a child, like it or not.

We need to de- emphasize the illusion of need for materialistic goods-change advertizing if it must exist lets make it real.

[BellyDancer]

I think the biggest implication of this is that we must create beautiful life experiences for ourselves and others. It's important that WE feel joy and have positive experience, else you get this problem with attachment. OF course, this is a political and economic issue much more than it is a individual or psychological issue right?

anybody care to comment

m

Well, I'm not entirely sure what you mean. We live in the areas where most of the world's wealth is concentrated. Throughout the poverty-stricken populations of many other countries, is it still possible to have joy and positive experiences? I think it is possible to have some, but impossible to have others. Children will always play, even if all they have to play with is dirt, but the mind cannot be content with dirt for very long.

Yes, I think at heart this is a political and economic issue in developing countries, but not as much in developed countries. True, we still face many hierarchies of worth, but the majority of us have food to eat, books to read, and toys to play with.

However, in spite of all these differences around the world, I think the most joyful and positive experiences come from our interactions with other human beings, which are usually plentiful, wherever we are. Babies all come from parents, and in the best situations, the parents (and/or other primary caregivers) take responsibility for the children. I don't think have or have not makes any difference in whether or not someone loves their children, or in the way love is expressed and felt. It just changes what kinds of opportunities parents can provide for their children, and what attitudes and behaviours they can model for them.

*******************************************************************

As to the Chapter, Michael, wow! It really has expanded! I find all of the material in this chapter extremely useful even if it does remind me I have a lot of things to resolve before I can safely connect (in all three areas, unfortunately). But for obvious reasons I'd rather know than not know, and you explain the issues in a very understandable way.

Thanks again for giving us a sneak peek at your work. 

[HAPPYELF]

As my self esteem was completely non existent as a teenager and semi adult, I have worked very hard to make sure that my childrens self worth is very high.  Mine now is very good, I understand more of my self than years ago, I am a part of the all and really it matters not what any one else thinks of me.  I am hoping that my children can assert this same behavior, they are unique they are one of a kind and they are loved no matter what others think of them.

Yes!!!!! absolutely!

(I am a barefoot person too, except for the winter.  But in the spring, the first day of outside bare-foot-ness in the grass is awesome!!!!!)

[HAPPYELF]

Well, I'm not entirely sure what you mean. We live in the areas where most of the world's wealth is concentrated. Throughout the poverty-stricken populations of many other countries, is it still possible to have joy and positive experiences? I think it is possible to have some, but impossible to have others. Children will always play, even if all they have to play with is dirt, but the mind cannot be content with dirt for very long.

Yes, I think at heart this is a political and economic issue in developing countries, but not as much in developed countries. True, we still face many hierarchies of worth, but the majority of us have food to eat, books to read, and toys to play with.

However, in spite of all these differences around the world, I think the most joyful and positive experiences come from our interactions with other human beings, which are usually plentiful, wherever we are. Babies all come from parents, and in the best situations, the parents (and/or other primary caregivers) take responsibility for the children. I don't think have or have not makes any difference in whether or not someone loves their children, or in the way love is expressed and felt. It just changes what kinds of opportunities parents can provide for their children, and what attitudes and behaviours they can model for them.

When the parents are stressed, it often falls on the children.   Not all parents who do love their children have the healthy skills in raising children which in some instances have to be taught.  People need dignity and support and in our society today dignity is given to those with a silver spoon in their mouthes.

he

[amiawake]

http://subscriber.michaelsharp.org/ego-childhood-presence/

this is a long one. The book of magic is turning into quite a treatise. There's about 3 times the amount of information in this chapter than in the first iteration. I guess I was too much in a hurry to get it out the first time. Oh well

m

wow.....
I feel like a package that has been sent UPS
all put together nicely
even placed intitally with love in the truck
then
thrown around at the transfer station
thrown around again at the airport
thrown back and forth through the various trucks
until I arrive at my destination
all beat up and broken

that is how your chapters affected me.

Many blessings
ami


edit:  that is not a bad thing

[BellyDancer]

When the parents are stressed, it often falls on the children.   Not all parents who do love their children have the healthy skills in raising children which in some instances have to be taught.  People need dignity and support and in our society today dignity is given to those with a silver spoon in their mouthes.

I have no doubt this is true, however...

My birth family was comfortable financially -- we had nice houses, drove a mercedes, lived in the Virgin Islands for a while and then in an affluent suburb of Denver...took fabulous vacations all over the place...I had the ice skating lessons, gymnastics, soccer, piano, french horn, guitar lessons...braces, excellent medical care and my first three vehicles given to me as presents.

But for most of that time my mom was battling breast cancer (she finally died when I was 14) and for the entire time my dad was emotionally & psychologically abusive and neglectful to me and my brother.

My brother has now been in and out of jail for armed robbery, theft, domestic abuse...his life is a disaster even more difficult to solve than mine. Growing up, circumstances dealt us wealth and a rotten upbringing. This combination did not result in healthy ego or attachment and it did not save us from intense indoctrination. It might have been even worse if we were poor, but I don't know.

I definitely believe some parents need to be taught, but one of the biggest difficulties, I think, is that some parents believe they already know everything, and rule their children's lives as if they were an all-powerful but capricious and vengeful god. They can do this regardless of socioeconomic status.

I guess the only thing I would say is that the middle class and the wealthy have access to counseling and other programs if they want to learn how to raise their children, whereas without certain charity programs, low income parents do not. But it still doesn't mean they'll use the access.

Unfortunately, a silver spoon doesn't guarantee a silver lining. And dignity on the outside does not always mean dignity on the inside.

Guess somebody managed to push my buttons, eh?